Let’s see if they will be mature and grow up or continue trolling

Dear RD64,

As predicted, my biggest fan is the first person to read up on my postings and comment at the break of dawn. Screen Shot 2017-05-10 at 8.36.00 AM

First of all, I don’t promote White worship and if you think that you obviously are not really reading what I am actually saying but read what you want to see so you can prepare yourself for another hateful rant against me. I said I used to date White guys exclusively but with those particular exes, they always focused on just the sex and the novelty of the relationship whereas I wanted more (love and commitment) and so therefore I am dating an Asian guy now who is a great boyfriend that loves me. My whole diary is literally about reflecting why I have had such an adoration with White culture and people and wanted to be more like them growing up. It is about my transition and how I decided it is not  shameful and to really take pride and self identify more with my Asian heritage.

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That isn’t hate speech. I don’t insult Asians or wish anyone any harm. In fact, I help many of them, who reach out to me because Asian subreddits ban people whose views don’t reflect the mentality of the echo chamber. Frankly I find it oppressive. There are so many people who share my views but are afraid to speak because of the type of backlash they will receive. For instance, just yesterday an Asian man who identified with my experience contacted me but he’s afraid to associate himself with me or sau how he feels in the forum because he knows if he shares his real experience he will be labeled a “White Troll.”

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This post doesn’t even make sense. I’m attracted to White men not Asia women lol. Just ask all the White guys I ‘ve talked to if you don’t believe me. Many of them know me very intimately. 😉

As for your consistent labeling of me as a “White Troll,” I wonder if you even know what you are talking about.

If I am really a “White Troll,” what is my purpose? What is my end game? What is it you think I am trying to do? And then think about what I have done – especially the last week or two and see if that even fits.

If anyone is racist around here it is you. As evident here you clearly do not like White people.

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Don’t forget I offered to walk away. I was not going to be involved in the Asian online community anymore. I don’t want to go back and forth all day with people and argue, I find it unproductive. What’s the point? So you guys don’t like me, fine I’ll leave. But Bumble (an Asian subreddit mod) told me to come back, he said he would help me. He told me to change my reddit name and post again. I even picked the name he suggested! He told me to unfollow people and I followed his advice. No matter what I say or do, I get attacked. If I say I like Asian guys and support Asian causes, you guys say I’m using it as a shield or pretending to care about Asian issues and if I say I am attracted to White guys I am labeled as a racist or a “White Troll” because obviously Asians can’t be attracted to Whites right? Instead of villianizing people you don’t agree with, why don’t we try to have dialogue and understand each other better, but you are not interested in that.

Don’t blame me for going to seek support from Tom (a White Man) because when I turned to the Asian community for support (this was before Tumblr and me going into my experiences with and views on White men, nobody in the Asian community helped me. Even recently, I reached out and asked for a mentor and it was radio silence for the most part (I do thank the handful that have reached out to give me advice here and there- They explained to me how paranoid everyone is in the sub because of a history of people trolling them and how they have a ban list of over 2,000 people – I’m sorry this happened but it’s not my fault, I don’t know them). Tom was with me everyday, molding me. So don’t blame me or Tom for my views after Tom’s influence if you all didn’t want to bother to spend time influencing my views or listening to me. The sad part is Tom is laughing at us, he said this was a making of a supervillian story, and maybe he’s right. The type of attitude and treatment you have given me will make someone hate Asians.

At the end of the day I prefer to have support from the Asian community but if they reject me I will take support where I can get it, whether it’s a Feminist group or a White supremacy group or even Black Lives Matter … I don’t really care to be honest. My view has always been to create a forum so that people like me can share their views without being hated on and persecuted. Just because an Asian woman is attracted to White Men doesn’t make her a bad person. Just because someone wants Hapa babies doesn’t mean them a villain. Just because you like White doesn’t mean you hate Asians.

So this back and forth is really going no where. So if YOU really are NOT a troll we will just end this. You say I am trolling your community, basically trying to cause infighting among yourselves (which by the way there is plenty of already – I literally saw Asian men users insulting each other and throwing the term “White Troll” at each other when they disagreed with whether violence is the correct way to solve things), then I will leave the Asian subreddits that won’t support me like r/hapa and r/aznidentity and rising sun… so long as you and your community stop trolling me and stalking me and posting slander/deragatory comments about me every chance you get. I will find my support and mentorship elsewhere since the Asian community did not want to give it but don’t get all butthurt about my views if someone else shaped them in a different way than you guys would have because I asked for guidance and didn’t get anything. And we walk our separate ways.

But you won’t want that – you don’t want me to go somewhere else while you cease your stalking and childish insults with your bullying friends any chance you get. I think you get a kick out of trolling. I think you want to spread your racism and continue to attack me because the truth is you are insecure about yourself, the truth hurts and what I says hurts your feelings. I bet you will probably make a post about my post and then continue to hurl your insults and try to assassinate my character to make you feel better about yourself. You don’t really want me to stop interacting in the Asian subreddit community, you enjoy it too much. Prove me wrong. Walk away and I will. Be a grown up for once in your life.



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